time

time passes
time flies
time seems to zip on by

brings changes
makes for growing
leads you to the self

not tomorrow's
or yesterday's
but now's
self

can't wonder bout
future/past
self
can only know
nowself

that's time
just now
no more
then gone

so stay
present

and don't fret
time knows
what we don't

the moon,

the moon hang fat and low the other day when i finally emerged from my bed, bundled up and left the house. i promptly blamed her for my senseless, constant, recent (but familiar) anxiety, 'ah, it's you... my dear, from the window i couldn't see you but now the evening has brought your xray image, a light bright white vision of fine lines and shadows, translucent and out of place in dusk sky.' the day was a write-off, considered too long and began too late, spent paralyzed in reflection - i know this day. this day follows me, peeps from around a corner... then pounces early in the morning without warning. this day is full of questions and wonder, not curious, nor hopeful, but more leery and apprehensive in nature. the questions and wonder are met with easy justifications and explanations - my mind is an expert, an old hand, no amateur here, i know my way around this maze of made up interpretation, defense, analysis and some pretense. i trod to the center, scale the wall with ease and sit atop it quite comfortably, my eyes perusing the twisted paths and the locked gate on the horizon ... in the mist. i sit here often and look out... i look out, pull my collar up against the cold and breathe until i'm dizzy. inhale, count to seven, exhale, count to seven.until my lighthead takes on the weight of a brick, sends me veering slight left, no right, and down.

the street is much too busy to look out from my perch. people are passing, talking, commenting, laughing - jostling, bustling, hustling. it's going to be winter soon. i'll be here. when that snow comes. i'll be here. i've chosen to. or the staying chose me. i'm not sure now. but i'll be here. when the sun returns, i'll be here. i've committed. in my own mind. and it's good. i'll be busy. But what happens when the moon returns?

thanks saf... sigh

ONLY FOUR DAYS LEFT!

dis-connect

sometimes you gotta feel
far flung and
detached to
see how to get in,
get back
on track
again.

and moreover,
if you even want to.

NUIT BLANCHE - a BUST

so unless you attended a scotiabank funded thereby city sanctioned event, you were harangued by police who so audaciously shut down public parties put on by real people for people to access in tha street (where people be, duh!) - tha police decided that during a purportedly ' city wide art thingy' (actual marketed tagline) but in effect it was a nuit blanche zone-wide art thing and turned out that regular people could not participate independent of corporate sponsorship by jammin out in front of or inside their homes and/or establishments.

my trajectory for the evening -

1. styrofoam ones and times neue roman UHAUL show at the lower kensington 11:30pm set- no 1. of 4 stops in the streets of this city - COPS SHUT US DOWN.
2. musicbox live installation with five featured musicians and installations by five artists inside - 12pm COPS SHUT US DOWN (amazingly for a noise complaint -at 12pm in kensington - in 'the area' although we had been shut down for almost 45 mins to give some sound respite to our friends in the UHAUL)
3. rolly's garage jam - 3am party going strong - we're thinking til the 6am nuit blanche official end, but no, wait - screech, that's five cop cars and 6 bike cops rolling up to... SHUT US DOWN.

horrendous, despicable, outrageous. that's why Harper can talk foulness about the arts, cause he's talking about galas and corporate sponsored events - know what real canadians are interested in? real artists with real connections to community who make real art to really share a sentiment with community in a way that is accesible and inclusive AND A CITY THAT DOES NOT SHUT US DOWN - why? because we're not in nuit blanche zone a ,b or c? just foolishness. i mean 'white night' - that's just creepy.

but here's something real unforgettable - the u-haul, wat a stellar idea fella, beauty clip

nneka - the uncomfortable truth

not interested

please don't push a product
please don't upsell the sale
please don't promo some improvement
i don't buy it
i won't buy it
i wouldn't even if i had the cash
but broke means
i'm not interested

just breathe

stop processing a moment

just breathe

cease the nonstop todos

just breathe

end the endless follow up

just breathe

the priority
becomes
apparent
when you

just breathe

friend,

oh friend,

friend,
i miss you -

i sense the
distance
but
moreover
i worry
about you
sometimes

at times
i fret that
you are
unhappy

see,
i worry
sometimes
that you are
not being
true
to you

or even
the possibility of
something new
for you

but these thoughts
are so much
less important
(and so much
more subjective)
than the fact that,

friend,
i miss you -

lawd,
i miss your
face
and
laughter

mostly
laughter

see,
i don't want to ask
but
when will i see you?

no,
i'm
not
so
busy

that one time
i fell asleep -
i'm so sorry

because
truly
i miss you
like 'crazy'
like alot
like i miss
myself
when life
becomes
'busy'

truly,
i must miss
myself
with yourself
mostly
when
we laugh
also
when
we chat
bout you
and me
and
endless
possibilities

so
come over
or
call me
cos friend,

i miss you
much
love

finance figures fall furiously

so what does it mean?
when media references the great depression?
when bush bails out billion dollar banks?

i imagine rats scurrying
or
liquid money riverbeds sucked dry
or
copper coins spilled through cracks

into pockets?
for cash can't quite disappear
science equations make that much clear -

but really,
bush has bailed out
banks with bad karma
commercial turn speculative
straight speculate about rates
that aren't their business
about figures that aren't their affair -

now 4 million
low income
home owners
working poor
soon on the street
with more to come

to be joined by slick haired men in suits?
oh no, the government came to their rescue
bailed them out with buckets of money
filled the holes in the bottoms of their steamships

but not you and me,
not 'the people'
our canoes stay tipsy

but 'the money'?
save the money!
the people will fend for themselves.

and we will.

damn the bank
damn bush
damn money

all speculation
no reparations
no consequences
all jumpin fences

what foolishness...
wait, how'd we get into this mess?

wrong question -
more important,
who got us into this mess?

why, the bank -
then why'd they get bailed out?

and why not the people?
why not you and me?
what did we do to deserve this frenzy
spinning out of our control
driving us from our homes
wreaking havoc on our economy
but we don't figure in the rescue plan -
cause the government prefers to save the bank
how?

to buy back their debt with taxpayers money.
our money
the people's money.

fine then,
take our money
but at least give us a say

cos, the banks are the ones that got us here in the first place -
these times show they can't be trusted with our money,
nor the rates.

so give us a say
c'mon give us a say
i say -

give us a SAY!

troy davis died on death row last night,

if you think the unjust prosecution and manipulation of witness testimony in order to kill an innocent black man cannot happen in 2008,

think again.

must see film this fall - FLOW

do you ever just not know?

i don't quite know.
i really have nothing to say -
and really and truly
you ought not listen to me anyway...

but sometimes we start things
without knowing where things go
but i value curiosity
(fuck the 'cat' - it will not kill me)

if we just take things slow
and allow things to grow
and see where they flow
we can begin to know

at least that's what i believe
so i won't fret bout it just yet
cause i know i don't need to know yet
the relevance will become clear to me

like water settled,
once murky
murky's not so bad
don't let it get you down
cos murky's full of learning
sift through murky
find sure ground

hold time close
but let it pass
let life happen
lay down and be glad

cos we don't need to know just yet
the knowing will come
i can feel it -
and besides
it feels good too
to not know just yet,
not quite yet.

do not befriend the market, heed taalam's words

thank you taalam acey for this succinct and eloquent analysis -

terry lynn - new video

she is terry lynn.
the album is kingston logic.
the single is system.

deal with it, star, she nah easy. big up to tha rickards bros on direction. respect.

my dear blogsphere,

i went away for a while -
i missed you.
i don't know why i stayed away so long -
i missed you.
i'm going to try and get back up because -
i missed you.

really, i didn't mean to go
a tizzydizzy of life had me do so
things have cleared a little
(in my mind at least)
i sense this page was a beginning
now i will accept all the offererings
this life continues to give me,
each day is a blessing.

i am humbled when i apologize -
people are so good and forgiving
i am surprised when i am open -
all the thing you wish for can happen
when you really start living
something you care deeply about
and believe in...

and i want to keep sharing
with you
because
truly
this blog was a real beginning.

bisous, blogsphere -
je t'aime.

adrian hayles aka dj sawtay, parkdale in progress

art blooms in parkdale,
artists of multi mediums
lurk among
the miscreants
the misfits
in these mean streets,
their gifts
bless our sight
helps our eyes to see
all the world
is free to be
or do or say
or scream
at you and me.

check 'the havenots' by adrian hayles (thanks sofree!)

d'bi young anitafrika - dub poet

please forward the clip to 5 minutes to hear my favorite poem by this brilliant black poet artist performer community activist womban mother sister friend. please visit us this week for the story tellers groundings conference at the new anitAFRIKA! dub theatre in liberty village TO.

game is my middle name

they say some foolishness bout 'behind every strong man, is a woman' and i say it's foolishness because this silly saying self perpetuates and we accept that the female partner's contribution is blurred in the background somewhere while we focus on the man out in front - here's what we lose - this is betty davis (second wife to miles who, as talented a musician as he was, beat every last woman in his life, mother included) - now livin in NYC, this woman pushed out albums in the seventies that are among the most raw rock n' soul i think i've ever heard. thx for tha tip cola!